Goodbye, baby. Baby, goodbye.

Posted by & filed under Hazel.

here it is

3 years and 74 days after we first introduced Hazel to her dear and beloved dewey (don’t ask, it’s just what she calls it. I know it’s really a paci…), we finally called it.

She was officially too old, and every day we overlooked the giant, glow-in-the-dark habit in the room, we knew it would be that much harder to break.

But goodness if that face isn’t hard to say no to.

thatface

I know that by this age, most kids have been paci-free for years. Oliver sure was.

But I bet I’m not the only Mama who feels a little less in a hurry to de-baby their babies. When you know it’s probably your last time around the diapering, rocking to sleep, dewey-needing block, you sometimes just want to drive a little slower and take in the scenery just a leeetle bit longer.

And so we did. For three years and 74 days.

And suddenly, just like that, we’d had enough of the scenery. The mouth plug was no longer cute. (And neither were the middle of the night “I can’t find my dewey!” emergencies…)

So one day last week, Ryan came home from work. With Hazel on his lap chatting, the subject of her dewey came up. He suggested that it might be time to say goodbye, and that it could be fun to have a little goodbye celebration that same evening.

It was super out-of-the-blue. And maybe it needed to be.

Hazel agreed and out the door we went! We snapped a few final photos with her #1 Habit.

family photo family pic

(photo credit… er… discredit, to Oliver for these)

And a little goodbye kiss with Daddy.

goodbyekiss

puppy eyes

Before anybody could change their mind, we drove straight to Whole Foods, let her pick out the prettiest cupcakes she could find, and took them to a coffee shop for a farewell ceremony and a snack.

I pieced together a couple of quick iPhone videos of Hazel’s final “hit” and the actual “throw-away” moment.

It’s funny, if you listen to Ryan and me in the first part of the video, neither of us is super sure about what is going to happen or how actually committed we are to this whole thing. I don’t even think Hazel’s entirely sure what she’s signing up for. BUT, boy howdy does she do it with confidence when the moment comes – check out her skip step feeling like a big girl on the way back from the trash can!

Isn’t she cool?

Of course, the not-so-cool part was the rage and grief that followed for a solid three days post-“celebration”.

Not. Happy. Times.

But I seriously think we’re in the clear now. Hazel is 9 days clean and counting!

And if you’re wondering, I totally stashed all of the non-ceremonial deweys in a safe place “just in case”. There have been several late-night moments of desperation when we totally wanted to break the glass in case of emergency, but we didn’t and I think we’re through the worst of it.

cupcake burgler

Can we get a single tear for the Mama whose little girl’s last real baby thing is behind her? I’m going to be a wreck when we can finally fit her hair into a legit pony tail!

[lace headband here]

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22 Responses

  1. Erin CF 7 June 2013 at 1:30 am

    So sweet. My oldest was an addict too and we let him keep his longer then most. I was kind of taken aback at the level of grief he experienced as a result of it being gone.. that soother was a real friend for him. It was hard for us to watch his hurt even though we felt sure that it was better for him and his soother to part ways. Even a couple years later when he reads the letter from the “soother fairy” he gets a tear thinking about giving away his soothers….I think he has recovered now though with no permanent damage….phew.

    Reply
    • raechelm 7 June 2013 at 8:47 am

      Sweet baby. I have so much empathy for him and you! You feel terrible taking away something they love so much, but you just hope that you know what is best for them and that you can do the hard thing when it’s necessary.

      Man, how much does that sound like our relationship with the Lord – we hold on to so many comforts and He knows what is best. Crazy how much we learn about ourselves and Christ just by being a parent!

      Reply
  2. Micaela 7 June 2013 at 8:41 am

    This is SO adorable – seriously?! So cute!!! I LOVE how excited she is to be such a big girl! Thanks for sharing :)

    I (apparently) kept my paci for years too! We call them dummies in New Zealand so I called it my dumdum. My Mum kept it attached to my pillow so I had to be in my room to have it. She says I would go & stand by my bed & lay my head on the pillow to have some down time with it. I’m sure it was very cute!!! Then 1 day I randomly threw it out the window & my Mum just refused to give me another 1!

    Reply
    • raechelm 7 June 2013 at 8:44 am

      This is adorable + hilarious x100!! Also, your Mum was brilliant to attach it to your pillow – if only I had thought of that three years ago!

      We did get clever about attaching one to Hazel’s carseat so that if she lost it in the car, she could fish for it herself. I used to get SO carsick hunting for deweys on long trips, so that was our little stroke of brilliance :)

      Reply
  3. Emily 7 June 2013 at 8:47 am

    A saying that has stuck with me with my second born is that “the days are long but the years are short”. Seeing my first starting school this week has DEFINITELY made me put the brakes on for sure!!!
    I’m so happy for Hazel, but it is so bittersweet! She’s absolutely precious!

    Reply
  4. Liz 7 June 2013 at 9:01 am

    What a sweet video…she is way too cute! Love how proud of herself she was in the video and those pictures of her with her “dewey” are so cute…those huge blue eyes and that bleach blonde hair, can’t get over it!!!
    My 3 year old sucks her thumb and has since about 3 months old…now try breaking that habit…oh vey! That is not an easy one since you can’t get rid of her thumb…..in her defense though I sucked mine till I was 7 and I was fine, ha!!!

    Reply
  5. keight 7 June 2013 at 9:10 am

    holy cow i love her and her heart. and i love our twin paci posts. and i LOVE ryan’s hair! (was that awkward capitalizing that love and not the others? a tad?) miss yall so!

    Reply
  6. April 7 June 2013 at 9:23 am

    So encouraging. My daughter just turned three and we have been avoiding taking away the paci. I haven’t been ready for the tears and tantrums but I think we will be having our own goodbye ceremony soon!

    Reply
  7. ShelbyDee 7 June 2013 at 10:48 am

    I hear tell that when the time came for my twin and me, our mama cut the ends off the pacis and we were done with them. Had no use whatsoever for them. I don’t know how old we were though. I do remember she had a harder time breaking our little sister of thumb sucking. She was the only thumb sucker of the bunch. She must have bee 5 or 6 when she finally quit.

    Reply
  8. meganblaire 7 June 2013 at 1:42 pm

    I love love love that you and Keight posted about getting rid of the paci in the same week :) And hearing sweet Hazel’s voice? *SWOON* So proud of her! {and her parents…that’s not an easy step!}

    Reply
    • raechelm 7 June 2013 at 4:58 pm

      Yes! I saw Keight’s post yesterday and couldn’t help but chuckle myself – same boat, same time! Only Layla’s technically a little ahead of the game, so it’s okay if it’s taking her a little longer!

      Reply
  9. alyssa 7 June 2013 at 9:35 pm

    WTG, Hazel! Such a big girl! My son was almost 4 when paci went away. He was losing them and I made my mind up that I wasn’t buying any more and when he dropped the last one in the yard, I hid it in my pocket. It was a bit rough when he realized it was gone at bedtime. About 4 months later, he was really upset about something and he sobbed to me, “Mom, I REALLY wish I had a paci to suck on.” :( After that moment, he never mentioned it again! And you’re right, you aren’t the only one not wanting to rush the de-babying of your baby!

    Reply
  10. Laura G. 8 June 2013 at 6:45 pm

    That was very brave on all your parts. Great description with her taking a last “hit”. I think it was helpful for it to come out of the blue. It would’ve been harder for me to part with coffee if I knew I’d surely be kissing it goodbye very soon, but I got my positive pregnancy test & we parted 7ish months ago. Then again, I didn’t really quit w/ decaf available. If only there was some more acceptable “decaf” version of a paci, eh?

    Oliver did a good job on the photos!

    Reply
  11. Cecilia 9 June 2013 at 5:09 pm

    We just did the same thing Memorial Day weekend with my daughter (three in October). It sounds bad, but we needed a three day weekend so it didn’t make work and preschool miserable for everyone. She still asks to look in her diaper bag sometimes, but doesn’t get upset anymore when she realizes its not there.

    Reply
  12. Kim Q 10 June 2013 at 9:51 am

    My daughter is 2 1/2, and we just got rid of her “mimi” last month too. We had talked about it to her a few times, and told her that we would put them in a box and send them to a baby. She had to get used to the idea for about a month, and then she actually brought it up one morning. I quickly grabbed a box, and there was no turning back! We threw all of her mimis into the box, sealed it up, and “mailed” it, i.e., stuffed it under mama and dada’s bed. The first night she was a bit sad, but not too bad, and then that was the end of it. It was just over. And like you, babyhood is now gone from our lives forever.

    Reply
  13. EveryChapter 11 June 2013 at 1:53 pm

    Adorable!! We are getting ready for our third round of this. We throw a big party, have cupcakes, and put the binkey on he porch in a box for some family that really needs it for their new baby- the grateful family leaves a little gift of appreciation. Our first baby cried for three hours straight at night and an hour less each of the next two nights, the second one cried for an hour and then was done, and we’re crossing our fingers that this little one will be the easiest. :) now the only question is potty train or toss the binkey? Which first? I’m thinking potty train…. whew- wish me luck!

    Reply
  14. Julie S. 11 June 2013 at 3:01 pm

    OH what a good idea! My son had the paci for just over 2 years. I didn’t want to take it away when our daughter was born– too much change. And now she is just as addicted. :) What a great way to go about it– and she is SO cute!

    Reply
  15. Megan 12 June 2013 at 9:58 pm

    Ok I seriously shed a few tears watching her throw it away. Its so hard to let them grow up. The night before we took our oldest daughters nuk from her I stayed up all night watching youtube videos of kids saying goodbye to their nuks. I was a mess! Turns out she was more ready for it than me!

    Reply
  16. Nannette 14 June 2013 at 9:19 am

    Cutest. thing. ever. Sure brings back memories of way too long ago! And how precious that you thought to video! So adorable.
    nannette
    a.k.a. CandaceJo ;)

    Reply

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